Miscarriage Limbo & WTF.

I seem to be stuck in limbo. After passing the tissue two weeks ago on March 23rd, I didn’t have much bleeding. Just spotting for about 8 days. Then nothing and I thought it was over. But then on Friday, April 3rd I started bleeding again. Dr. Google says if 20 days have not passed, then it’s not a period, it’s still the miscarriage. So who knows. I am going back on Thursday, April 9th for a 7th beta. I guess that will tell us for sure if it’s down to zero or if there is still tissue lurking.

We also met with Dr. Kaplan again for the re-group (aka the WTF appointment). He cut to the chase and said that he has no answers about what keeps happening or why. Also, my genetic testing of the tissue was inconclusive. It came back as maternal tissue contamination, which means they could only find my cells. Totally bogus and it makes me wonder if I should have just had a D&C. His only recommendation is a hysteroscopy before our next transfer, but unfortunately he doesn’t do them, so I’d need to get on with my OB/GYN. Also unfortunately, I’m in the market for a new OB/GYN. I made an appointment with one for May 12th, so hopefully I like her and she can schedule a hysteroscopy for my next cycle – it has to be CD6-10.

Beyond that he said we can try again, adding in whatever protocol Dr. Kwak-Kim recommends, or we can use a surrogate. So there we are. It’s rough to hear a doctor tell you to consider a surrogate, even if you are already considering one in your mind. The cost of surrogacy is almost insurmountable unless you’re Jimmy Fallon, so I don’t know how that can be our next step. I am trying very very hard to wait until we meet with Dr. KK to make any decisions about the future, but being stuck without a plan or a timeline is so stressful for me.

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