12 Weeks.

Happy 2nd trimester, baby B. I wish you would have stuck around to enjoy it.

It’s now been more time since I lost the pregnancy than it was from the start of IVF to the m/c. Time seems to be going extremely fast, which is a nice change from the first few weeks after everything happened. I keep wondering if I will have a natural cycle now, but given my PCOS history I guess it’s unlikely. I still have 2 or 3 weeks to decide what I want to do next. I am feeling a little antsy, like I’d like to get the pain of the next failure over with. That’s probably not the most positive outlook for starting a new cycle, but it’s how I’m feeling now. Things are better as long as I don’t think about them for too long. Weird milestone dates like today are hard – I was planning on telling everyone about the pregnancy today – but there aren’t that many more of them until our EDD of Christmas. For now I’ll try not to dwell on the past, and I’ll have a cocktail for baby B.


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